Yoga
And right now the only thing I'm all that interested in talking to you about is the "party" or whatever I want to have at the end of the year when all this is over...I want this party so desperately, it's a little scary.
I don't know when this bee began buzzing in my bonnet, I only know that it's there and I feel it's incredibly necessary to my peace of mind.
I've NEVER had a party, well...okay, one, at Showbiz Pizza Place which is now, of course, Chucky Cheese. And I was, perhaps, six? Six at the most. And after that, there were family gatherings of our immediate family to celebrate that I, like everyone else still roaming the earth, had aged another year. Everybody gets a birthday, it's mandatory. BUT! Not everyone gets a college graduation. They just don't. It's expensive, both the schooling itself and the potential party, but it's also special, ya know?
I want just to see that it meant something real. I want to see the people I love and who have cared and helped and even just been around while I made it through school see that I did it. Despite all those moments when I swore I couldn't.
Yeah, it's fucking sappy. I also want it to be an aesthetically cool, fun, and a party!
I just...given the precedent for things just really not working out like that...want to put it on record that at one point, albeit before I've gone through the hell this semester should bear down on my skull, that I wanted a fancy, candley, adult, Christmas-graduation party.
Okay?
I remember when I was just starting this diary
